Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace

Emotional intelligence will whisper in the ear of who gets promoted. That's blunt, but true. Over a few decades now of working with boards in Sydney and conducting workshops in Melbourne and Brisbane, I've seen technical competence get you through the door and emotional intelligence help you stay long enough to play the game. Today's workplace values people who can read the room, calm the nerves of a team under duress and translate raw technical skill into collective achievement. Why all of that matters now, well, it could not be more clear. Work is more distributed than ever, hybrid teams, cross border projects, stakeholders with conflicting incentives. Without a strategy and processes, yes they are needed, but without them they won't be sufficient. It is performance that emerges from the human stuff, how we cope with stress, how we hear one another, how we recover from setbacks. Emotional intelligence (EQ) is not some touchy feely luxury. It's practical talent management. Look, what many companies are investing in is certifications, tools and shiny metrics at the expense of EQ training. And I also think that we should be taught EQ basics alongside accounting and coding. Not everyone will agree. Fine. Debate keeps us sharp.

What EQ Really Means

Emotional intelligence, at its core, is about being aware of how you and others feel, and using that information to navigate your thinking and behaviour. It's not an inborn trait you're either born with or stuck without; it's a set of skills you can build. Think of EQ as the plumbing that enables all those "hard" tech systems to work: without it, you have leaks and blockages and outcomes that leave much to be desired, no matter how good or wise your intentions. Organisations which regard EQ as a "nice to have" quickly discover they have disengaged staff, slow decision making processes and more turnover. Those who can keep their emotions under control and accurately read those of other people will make society anew in the challenge they face: this is how social conditions for innovation or resilience may emerge. That's why the World Economic Forum identified emotional intelligence as one of the top job skills for employees in 2020 and beyond, because employers are placing a higher priority on the ability to work across complexity and ambiguity.

Four Pillars to Keep Your Eyes On (and no, it's not a taxonomy test)

Most models parse EQ into four complementary domains: self awareness, self management, social awareness and relationship management. Simple. Useful. Relevant.

• Self awareness: Understanding what you're feeling and why you feel it; understanding how emotions affect moods and decisions
• Self management: Controlling impulses, maintaining your composure, acting in line with long term goals
• Social awareness: Picking up on non verbal cues, reading the room, understanding cultural differences
• Relationship management: Resolving conflict effectively, guiding others through challenges, building trust among colleagues

These are not a sequence of boxes to tick, one after the other. They double back on each other. And they are behind every interaction that counts, from a one on one with a direct report to the tough board level negotiation.

Self Awareness: The Foundation

Start here. If you can't label what you're feeling, you can't manage it. Simple as that. Try a pause after your next high stakes meeting. How did you feel, precisely, anxious, bored, defensive? Why? What triggered it? Short, regular reflection isn't therapy, it's professional hygiene. It clears the fog of uncertainty, calms reactionary and raises the quality of decision making. Some will give you the old saw that too much introspection leads to paralysis. That's a half truth. Reflection without action is sterile. Reflection with small, conscious experiments is potent. Make a note. Try a small change. Measure the outcome. That's how professionals get smarter, not less hard.

Self Management: Calm Under Pressure

Good leaders are not unfeeling. They're emotionally literate. They regulate rather than repress. That means putting off that sharp email; rehearsing a challenging conversation or visualising how you can stay open, honest and present in it; taking micro breaks of breath to prevent escalation. Self management is about aligning behaviour with values, showing up, even when the day has gone to hell in a handbasket.

Practical tip: use implementation intentions. Instead of "I will be calm in meetings" say: "If a client talks over me, I will breathe three times and ask for them to complete their thought." It sounds so minor until you're floundering under pressure and your mind is hijacked by habit.

Social Awareness: Empathising with Purpose

Social awareness is not about being a pushover. It's about interpreting perspectives and the worlds that create them. On cross cultural teams, that can mean the difference between a healthy debate and a communication breakdown. One effective approach is to use a stakeholders mapping, beyond roles or influence, into most likely emotional drivers. Whatever this person tosses and turns over. What do they value? With this simple lens, you can change how negotiations and collaboration are perceived.

Relationship Management: The Art of Influencing Indefinitely

This is where those who are emotionally intelligent convert frank, true friendship into a desired action. Listening is what brings accountability. It's returning feedback in a manner that energises someone rather than zaps energy. It's a trust building exercise, so teams try things and fail fast while learning. A reality check: technical skill on its own will rarely help to maintain team morale or creativity. You need both. EQ training improves technical proficiency. You'll see a better return on your Investment when people are able to provoke each other constructively, without conversations descending into discussions of politics.

Why Organisations Should Care, and Come Clean About It

There's a plain Business case. High EQ teams are more adaptable, better at decision making in uncertainty, and use performance under stress. The candidate can tick "Python" or "financial modelling" on a list but can't embed them into better relational and analytical practices. Here's a pretty solid data point: TalentSmart, which has tested the EQ of more than a million people, found that it explains 58% of success in all types of jobs. Whether you take that number as gospel or a directional estimate, it's a wake up call: EQ matters measurably. Another sobering figure: According to worker data from the Australian Bureau of Statistics and associated mental health numbers, large slices of the workforce have mental health challenges every year. Emotional skillsets, recognising when stress is getting too much, responding in a caring manner and knowing when to escalate, are not simply "nice to have". They come as part of duty of care and risk management.

Training That Works

It's true, many corporate EQ programmes are powerpoint presentations disguised as learning. They are dreadful because changing behaviour is about practising, reflecting upon, discussing the nuances of and reinforcing new ways of doing things. What works:

• Short, practical modules drilling into everyday situations (tough conversations, remote collaboration, giving feedback)
• A mix of coaching / peer practice / manager led reinforcement. One off workshops you will forget; ongoing coaching embeds change
• Measurement. Pre/post surveys and behaviour observation/manager ratings provide you with visibility of real change
• Leadership modelling. If senior leaders aren't visibly working on their EQ, middle managers won't, either

I'll go out on a limb here and make another slightly controversial assertion: for EQ, "live" coaching, whether in person or virtually, kicks the pants off self paced modules. Digital material has a role, but the muscle memory of emotional skill is built through guided practice and feedback. Companies who try to scale EQ through microlearning alone end up with knowledgeable participants and zero behavioural lift.

Every Week, Practical Habits to Build EQ

You don't need an explicit course to start improving. What to try:

• 5 minute reflection at the end of the day: what went well emotionally? What triggered you?
• One act empathy: Tell a colleague once a day, "How are you really going?" and listen
• Micro breaks: build in to your schedule three breaths before escalating by email
• Rehearsal: on a difficult meeting, role play the first three lines with a friend or a coach ahead of time
• Feedback loop: each month ask for one specific piece of behavioural feedback and act on it

Measure progress easily, less escalations, higher peer feedback scores, real talk in team meetings. Remember: small changes compound.

Leadership and Culture: The Big Levers

Leaders drive the bus. An Organisation breathes easier when leaders make it safe to be vulnerable. That doesn't mean leaders overshare; it means showing emotional clarity and modelling a healthy response. Performance management is another lever. We incentivise collaboration and emotional intelligence, not just individual performance. Elevate those who can process complexities with humanity. It's a cultural change and culture changes slowly, but it is worth it. They are lower turnover, but higher discretionary effort. We have applied these principles many times. In our work across Australia, from Canberra public service teams to retail shops in Perth, the story is consistent: we teach leaders to value EQ and they create measurable lifts on engagement and performance.

Some eyebrow raisers on what they believe:

• Jose thinks we tend to overemphasise the importance of formal qualifications in leadership
• Skills are more important than letters after a name in a lot of cases
• Universities need better integration of interpersonal curriculum into degrees (also help us get work ready)
• Coaching is money better spent than that extra technical training when your business needs the team working better together

Not everyone will agree. Good. If that stimulates discussion, then we're elevating the conversation from buzzword to concrete action.

Measuring Impact, and Being Realistic About Limits

You can measure changes in engagement, manager ratings or retention. You are able to monitor conflict incidence and time to resolve. But let's not pretend EQ training is a silver bullet for all organisational ills. It won't solve bad strategy, egregious process failures or toxic incentives overnight. EQ is a multiplier, use it to a sound strategy and you have the exponential returns.

Final Thought, Plus an Abrupt, On Purpose Conclusion

Emotional intelligence is not a soft add on. It's not a sexy sounding ability, but it takes technical capability and turns it into consistent organisational performance. Invest in it deliberately. Teach it where you can. Coach it regularly. And for heaven's sake, demand that your leaders do everything they can to create a social climate where this kind of growth cannot be unleashed. We operate programs that integrate practice, coaching and measurement. We've witnessed teams go from friction to flow. That's not fluff, it's commerce. So start somewhere. A small action today can change results down the road by months.

Sources & Notes

• TalentSmart. "Emotional Intelligence Appraisal" (a sample of thousands who have taken the assessment). TalentSmart, an expert in EQ research, is one of its most quoted sources and writes that emotional intelligence accounts for 58% of job performance. (Accessed details via TalentSmart publications.)
• World Economic Forum. "The Future of Jobs Report 2020. Names emotional intelligence as one of the most in demand skills by 2025. World economic forum (2020)
• Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS). There are significant national mental health data and associated labour force statistics for the prevalence of mental illness in the workplace, these background figures serve as touchstones for the claims made regarding emotional literacy in the workplace and stated duty of care provisions. Australian Bureau of Statistics, select releases (2017 to 2022)
• Our insights have been developed from delivering training in market and coaching Geelong and a corporate environment spread as far as Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Perth and Canberra by our team at Paramount Training & Development.